Falling in love -lyrics critique- pop

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Falling in love -lyrics critique- pop

by Amanda Brown
(Anaheim, Ca, USA)

I thought about you all last night
I wondered what youd do if I was in sight
Would you kiss me or make a move
Would I accept you, would my best friend approve
I'm only asking you all of these things
because without you my heart stings

I need you more than the clouds in the sky
I need you more because the rain makes me cry
I need you more because i'm falling in love

I think about you everyday
I wondered what youd do if I walked your way
Would you hold my hand
or hold me close so I understand

I need you more than my heart in my chest
I need you more because your not like the rest
I need you more because i'm falling in love

Love is what I feel when you talk to me
Love is when you blind me, I can't see
Love is a story of what we can be

So take my hand, and come be with me
because I need you
Yes I need you
Oh I need you

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Falling in love -lyrics critique- pop

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Mar 31, 2009
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Some tweaking suggestions
by: Patrick

Hi, if I can be blunt/straight, I like your first verse the best though I think the end of the 2nd and 6th lines are a bit weak. The 2nd verse seems a little unfocused clichéd and seems like it should be longer, doesn’t seem to compliment the 1st verse or build from it. The choruses are good but not sure about the line …..heart in my chest, although I think the title of the song is a bit clichéd and could possibly depending on your melody be placed at the beginning of the chorus in a rewrite. I think the Love is section should be a middle 8 and not a chorus melody if that’s what you intended. Anyway I hope my comments are of some help to you Cheers Patrick

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