Beating Lyrics critique - probably trance, but that doesnt rlly matter...

by Dj Tetris (not the spanish one...)
(Riviere-du-loup)

So yeah this is the first full song i ever wrote... i know its not really good, like the 2nd verse is weird and some of the wording is a bit akward, but thats why i'm posting it here. Also, i want it to convey the meaning that i am painfully in love with a girl i'm not supposed to be in love with... like a friend that were i to fall in love with her, it would destroy our friendship... but i want to convey to her how much i love her without it hurting us because staying silent was killing me, literally. so yeah. thats it.


--BEATING--
VERSE 1
there's a
beating in my heart
i can't recall when it did start
it's always there and it wont stop
and it is tearing me appart

i've looked and
searched from where it comes
it's origins are very glum
a hint of sadness, lots of want
as if it's searching for some one
and

CHORUS
like the beating of a bass drum
it's always there
it is overpowering and
it fills my head

and i cannot silence it
even if i try
i'm afraid that it will be there
for all my life

VERSE 2
I've scruti-
-nized its meaning now
i've studied it for quiet a while
i've learned some things to make some frown
and yet it always makes me smile

it's painfull when i'm far from you
it's ecstasy when i'm with you
like the cure to a poison bite
there's only you to make it quiet

CHORUS
like the beating of a bass drum
it's always there
it is so powerfull
it fills my head

i cannot silence it
no matter how i try
i'm afraid it will be there
all my life

so yeah.. tell me what u think...